Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Nap's IV: The Voyage Home

News is spreading like wildfire of a new Naps, tentatively named Nap's IV. Calling it "the ultimate destination for the Nap's enthusiast" Nap promises the following:

• "The Nap Pack" - enhanced satellite TV subscription.
• Expanded scratcher card vending machine.
• Semi-permanent bacon dog cart w/ full topping bar.
• "Over the Nap" - free well drink if you beat Nap at arm wrestling. All hours.
• "Sunday Naps" - cots available out back for all bottomless Bloody Mary customers. 3rd Sundays.
• Chili cookoff every 4th Saturday. Nap judges.
• Nap's wraps - free condoms to all paying customers.
• "Nap's Snaps" - yo mamma joke contest every 2nd Friday 5-8 p.m.
• "Wet Naps" - kiddie pool every Saturday afternoon. All summer long.

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