Weekly Buzz: September 12 - 18

Week of September 12 - 18

HOT
Customized ventriloquist dummies
Skateboarding
Frozen White Castle sliders
Fast talking Freddies and shifty eyed Sharons
Blasians
Smoking circus animals
Spooky Drums No. 1
Jim Henson
Adam de Boer

NOT
Bacon
Lyme Disease
Enamel
Toronto
Puccini

Singing Timmy's Tune With One Eye Closed: Popular Phrases From Noir Novellas

Jonesin for a Jesse
Suzie got your eyebrow
Plowing the President's begonias
Putting a snap in your Charlie
Flushing the checkers down the drain

Twiddling your thumbs while a bird tickles your pennies
Choking on your own caramels
Flipping an apple for a Ricky
Playing butterfingers with the kitty
Shaving off a layer of Uncle Sam's heels

Puckering up for an upside down goldfish
Sipping on a rotten Robbie
Sinking two Tommy's while floating on a Randy
Rubbing your tail til the Vinny van arrives
Coughing up a blank telegram

The Year In Slam Poetry...So Far

The Year In Slam Poetry...So Far

•Tonsillitis of the mind. Perpetuation of mis-classification. A cry from yonder.
•Periodization via calcification of a Plutarch whose name shall remain dark.
•Quarantine yes, but Constantine no. Arch-typical conflation is a typo of the un-stepped truth.
•Reptilian is what, is what, yes that. A vestigial orgy once wept.
•The color of taste. Saddens post-apocalyptic dramaturgists.

•Scintillation or edification. Which shall cross the swollen river's edge?
•A subtle instance of mimetic inference. A lasting ray of light.
•Lashes batted and bruised.
•Okra once. Okra twice. Never thrice. Livid yet cold.
•Callous emancipation. Vacation. A vacuum.

The Willenium: Will It Ever End???

Big Willie style continues to terrorize America further with the following slated releases:

Left of Dunk (2010)
Beachwax Forty (2011)
Sender Sander, Mr. Tophat (2011)
Breezin' (2013)
Business Class (2014)
Tiptoe Stranger The Uplifter (2014)
Nine Lives Of A Curious Mortician (2014)
No Sandals, Know Sleep (2015)

A Thoroughly Offensive And Surprisingly Exhaustive Alphabetical List Of Countries Where The Barrel Remains An Acceptable Form Of Attire

A Thoroughly Offensive And Surprisingly Exhaustive Alphabetical List Of Countries Where The Barrel Remains An Acceptable Form Of Attire

Bosnia and Herzegovina
Cape Verde
Gabonese Republic
Georgia
Kyrgyz Republic
Latvia
Malta
Republic of Nauru
Netherlands
Northern Cyprus
Palau
Poland
Romania

Cracked Out Sweaty Ass Drug Dealer Casual Attire For Around The House

Nothing but a...
Body gong
Neon oversized windbreaker
Camouflage cape
Leopard head hat
Rubber fly-fishing overalls
See-through raincoat
Chainmail suit of armor
Gold leaf toga

DIVE BARS YOU DON'T EVEN BE KNOWING ABOUT

DIVE BARS YOU DON'T EVEN BE KNOWING ABOUT

MISSION
The Diamond Cutter
The Ice Hut
Pic-n-Pac
The Coal Mine
Cap-N-Trade
The Punch Bowl
Wood Chipper
The Boiler Plate

TENDERLOIN
The Up-Tick
Buckle Barn
Bird's Nest
The Match-Stick
Cro-Bar
Jasper's
Kool-It
Itsy-Bitsy

SOMA
The Paper Trail
The End Game
Tap Time
Mole's Nose
Paulie's Place
Libby's Latch
The Tone-Down
Nervous Nick'l
The Hi-Five